Monday, November 8, 2010

Dating, Narcissism, and other stuff happening on the internets

First of all.  Did everyone watch last week's 30 Rock?  Did you catch that great line by Avery Jessup when she told Jack she didn't need a mentor?

"I'm fine!  I sleep 4 hours a night, eat 1,200 calories a day, and my closet has been on the cover of organized living twice!"

I have a lot of work to do...


Today, one of my best friends, who I will refer to as Fair Lisa (b/c that was her nickname in High School) sent me the following the text message.

Don't take this the wrong way but last night I went on a date with the male version of you and didn't like him!  The whole time I was thinking... I would like him better if he was just Kelsey.


This was so intriguing to me!  My male counterpart... was he good looking? Was he funny?  I kind of want to meet him.

No you're better looking she wrote back But his mannerisms and speech patterns were spot on.  It was so wack.


Then I started wondering, what would it be like for me to go on a date with this guy?  I guess it would essentially be dating myself.  But would I like myself?  Would I discover I do things I think are charming that are actually totally obnoxious?  Would we have non-stop witty banter and intelligent debate?  Or would we sit in aloof silence asking polite small-talk-type questions.

Finally, I decided my wanting to go on a date with someone who was described as "the male version of you" is just about the most narcissistic thing I've thought lately, and got back to work.

Speaking of dating.  It can be hard right?  I think there was a Seinfeld episode where he was whining about first dates because when you go out and you're at a restaurant, everyone else there knows you're on a date!  And then you get past the first couple dates, and it's not so awkward but it doesn't necessarily get easier.  There's the meeting of each other's friends, and the re-working of your weekend plans to fit another person into the schedule, and figuring out how you greet one another (do you kiss hello?) and if you're the type of couple who holds hands or links arms or doesn't touch when they walk down the street.  Then eventually there's compromise and sacrifice, and discussion of life goals and core values, and where are we spending holidays?...ok, no, I've never made it that far, but that's what I've heard happens.

So relationships are complicated, yea?  And they're totally worth it, but sometimes you need a second opinion...or six.  Love of Friends (my passion project remember?) has started a new project in which we're allowing you, or the general public, to write, type, or tweet your relationship queries to us, and we will answer them for you on our website www.loveoffriends.com

What are our qualifications for this you ask?  Well, officially none.  Other than the six of us having been on a lot of dates, and involved in a lot of relationships of varying levels.  You might get some conflicting advice, since between all of us there's bound to be some differing viewpoints, but our hearts are in the right place.  Also, 50% of the team is in a relationship and 50% is single, and so you're getting a nice balanced view of your question.  At the very least, we'll give better advice than Cosmo.  (Cosmo, if you're at all interested in hiring us to write an advice column we can totally talk).

So send us your questions about love, dating, friendship (relationship advice is not limited to romantic relationships) or just send us the story of the worst date you've ever been on, or the best, or the strangest, and we can compare.

The strangest date I've ever had?  The Artist and I once went on a date with the same guy... at the same time.  It's a long(ish) story, which I won't get into here, but would be happy to share in more detail next time you see me at a party.

Speaking of the Artist.  She's blogging!  And it's awesome of course.  Check it out, subscribe, comment, add it to your Google Reader, be totally jealous of the fact that I have a bunch of her original pieces in my house.

1 comment:

  1. I actually enjoyed reading through this posting. Many thanks.
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