Monday, November 23, 2009

Iceberging, Bamboozlement, and Sometimes the Universe has your back.

I'm going to preface this post with the following definitions.

Iceberging: verb. When you've been on a couple of dates with someone, and you're not feeling it, but it's too early to actually have a break-up conservation. So, you "iceberg" them. In reference to the eskimos putting their elderly on an ice float, and sending them out to sea. Becoming busy forever, ignoring phone calls, and gently pushing them out to sea.

Bamboozled: verb. When a girl is confused by a guy. Usually because he's just not that into her, but every once in a while acts like he is. The term is usually used in statements such as "He bamboozled me! I'm such a fool!"

The number 1 thing to keep in mind while dating in Pittsburgh: You will see this person again.

Over the summer I was dating a guy. I actually liked him, and we made it past 3 dates (usually the point at which I decide I'm bored) so this was exciting. Towards the end of August I stopped hearing from him. Iceberged, I figured. Bummer, but you win some you lose some.

A month later, a phone call, apologies, excuses for being consumed with grad school. Whatever I figure, it's not as though there's anyone else, and we had fun. So, started seeing him again. 2 weeks of hanging out, flirtatious texting, etc. After which, nothing. (seeing a pattern here?) Bamboozled! I thought. And iceberged! Not only was this a bummer, it was a little embarrassing.

Nearly 2 months go by. Get over it, rebound, get over the rebound. Then this morning, while minding my own business, listening to Morning Edition, and drinking my coffee, who should come stand next to me on the bus. Oh Pittsburgh, I love and hate that you're such a small town. Catch up, tell anecdotal stories from the weekend, say it was good seeing you, play it totally cool.

Then 10 minutes later, a text message. From him. "dinner tonight?" it asks.

"NO! " My mind yells at the text message. "No! no! No! Terrible, bad, awful idea!" All of this is what I'm thinking as I watch myself type "sure." into my phone and hit send. We set a time, a place, and I spend the rest of the morning telling myself that "Well, clearly I hate myself, but it's just dinner, and I know he's not really interested, but it's not like I had plans tonight anyways. This will be fine. What am I going to wear?"

Then get back from lunch to find the following text message "hey, have to back out. Got slammed with a project. Real disappointed and sorry"

Palm to forehead slap.

Feel disappointed, eat fun-sized chocolates, listen to the yeah yeah yeah's, make plans with roomate to do yoga, drink wine, and get Thai takeout. Have a great evening. Realize that sometimes, the universe has your back, saving you from your own poor judgement, and keeping you from having a dinner you definitely shouldn't have.

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