The Anatomy of a Proper Sandwich

There are some things in life I just know to be true.  Things like, I know how to make a good sandwich. While the majority of my culinary skills may not be what one would call advanced, I can make a sandwich that rocks.

Last night, I stopped by my sister's apartment to go to a party.  Lynn had made hummus, and bought a bottle of wine to bring, and just when I thought I couldn't be more impressed with her adult-ness, I mention I'm hungry, and she immediately responds with, would you like a sandwich?

Heck yes, I want a sandwich!

So she pulls out a sandwich wrapped in paper and some cheese, and says, this is from Panera, and here's some cheese if you want to add it. (This should have been the first warning sign, any good sandwich already has cheese on it. duh.)

I unwrap and open the sandwich to add the cheese and stared at it.  Sitting on the 2 pieces of bread was a slice of tomato, a piece of lettuce, and some green spread, that I assume was a guacamole type substance.  I blinked and looked again, but nothing had changed.

"Lynn!!" I yelled.

"What?"

"There's nothing on this sandwich!!"

laughs, "It's vegetarian!"

Which, I mean, come on!  Vegetarian sandwiches are great, but they usually involve some mushrooms, or eggplant, or I don't know, anything more than a piece of lettuce and a tomato. I mean really Panera, what do you even call that sandwich?  It's an insult to call that thing a sandwich.

Lynn grabbed some turkey out of her fridge, so between that and the added cheese, I actually was able to eat a proper sandwich. And it was good.  Just be wary of the vegetarian selection at Panera...